By infusing ancient Chinese secrets herbs into a dissolvable breath strip, Stiffy Strips combines the breath-freshening power of Listerine with the libido-boosting qualities of Viagra to make one minty, sexy hybrid. Each strip contains a smattering of herbal extracts, including Yohimbine for increasing sexual desire, and Cinnamon Bark, which increases blood flow to the extremities. Each of the eight herbs work in unison to wake your peep out of its rested, worried slumber. Place a Stiffy Strip under the tongue, wait twenty minutes, and enjoy up to twelve hours of energy and arousal. Twelve hours?! Challenge accepted.

Jeremy Glass typically uses photosynthesis for energy on days when his stamen is ready for that sweet pistil action.

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